My secret handshake with Dairy Queen

DQ Blizzard

You know, I don’t remember how old I was when I first went to Dairy Queen. And I don’t remember what day it was when I had my first Blizzard. But I do remember the taste… oh that sweet taste… of the very first Pecan Cluster Blizzard I had. The problem is, kids today are being deprived of such a flavor. In fact, I bet most of you have never experienced the sheer bliss that I know of as the Pecan Cluster. There’s a good reason you probably don’t it. It’s simple. THE PECAN CLUSTER IS NOT ON THE MENU.

Now, there aren’t many things I know of in this world to ask for that aren’t on the menu. I’d love to be one of those old folks that’s been going to their local diner for 30 years… and even though such and such a dish isn’t there, they know they can ask for it… and sure enough, Jimmy in the back knows how to cook it up for them.

Ordering something that isn’t on the menu, especially from such a widespread, multi-national chain like Dairy Queen, makes me feel pretty privileged. It’s as if I have a secret handshake with each and every one of them. So the next time you go to Dairy Queen (or DQ as the kids call it), be sure and ask for a Pecan Cluster Blizzard. Know that it won’t be on the menu, but they’ll make it for you. And if you look close enough, you’ll see the little DQ maker smile to themselves, knowing you’ve been a customer of theirs long enough to be able to order something special. As they serve it to you, watch them flip it upside down — and then, enjoy it as you go to town.

[DQ, you are free to use that last line as a slogan… but be warned, it could also be confused as explicit rap lyrics.]